It’s been several months since I have uninstalled every hookup app from my iPhone. I decided that it was no longer worth it to spend my time and energy on something designed to make sex easy, but in reality results in permanent dissatisfaction! The strange chain reaction of “done, next” had consumed me as it became addictive to scroll through delicious looking grids in search for yet untasted meat.

Two good friends of mine have shared two different, curiously opposite, Grindr stories. Both in good physical shape, both in their mid 40’s, both in an open relationship! The first guy was deeply frustrated by an unhappened date. Half a day spent exchanging face pix, body pix, dirty pix, with jokes and compliments in between he was sure that he would finish his evening with some good banging, but only ended up masturbating alone to fetish porn for the rest of the night before going to sleep. 


My other friend downloaded Grindr because he finds it amusing to chat guys up for horny conversations. So out of sheer boredom one evening, already in bed but not able to sleep, he decided to log on, just for fun. An attractive face got his attention as they went on to exchange face pix, cock pix, ass pix, jokes and compliments in between. A mischievous smile on his face, when he was telling me how much he enjoyed making someone horny online with no intention of doing anything, was all I needed to reascertain my decision to have sent Grindr & co to hell!

I would lie if I said that I didn’t have some quality naked action with the guys I met online – you do get nice surprises! Yet it somehow feels that you’re back to square one when you see them logged on again hours after they left your place (meaning, you’re logged on too!). Not talking the locations where the internet may be the only way to search for sex. But in my big gay-friendly city experience, getting the ass up and physically going out to meet like-minded people builds a foundation for longer and deeper acquaintance as you won’t waste your precious time figuring out what they’d look, sound and smell like in real life. It may be more challenging and time consuming than tapping the phone, but the taste of the hard (earned) reward feels that much sweeter!


November 16, 2016


“Emotions are all we got!” That was the last phrase of Harvey Keitel’s character in Youthbefore he jumped from a balcony to his death betrayed by a bitch he had admired, played by Jane Fonda. 

The more I talk about the physical part of intimacy in my articles, the more I realize how much I must chip in my two cents ...


Sex can be both good and bad for you. Good, if you do it right: a boost in mood, restful sleep afterwards, a more-or-less lasting relationship. Bad, if you don’t: unpleasantly painful experience, embarrassing accidents, a disease! Sometimes it’s a matter of knowing what you are doing. And yet most of the time it’s about wanting to know what, or whom, you are doing! 


Many complain about their looks but none about their brains! 

I had to suppress my laughter recently when a cute guy I made out with said to me that his arms could never grow as big as mine. Far from being a bodybuilder type, and neither do I strive to be, I have to say that about half a decade ago I had the same kind of thinking ...


“No Asians!,” “Black only!!!,” “Hairy Middle Eastern preferred,” etc. – sadly still a common occurrence when you read online profiles! I always like to tell a story about a guy from the Philippines, as Asian as they get, who, to my awkwardness, read a surprise on my face when I opened his underwear and saw a 20 cm, thick cock hiding in there. 


Based on Gay Sex in the City column from Gay&Night magazine, published in Netherlands and  Belgium and the blog entries, the e-book is available for download on Amazon, AppleBooks, Kobo and Barnes and Noble


Misha M is a columnist and an author. In the blog he shares his sexual adventures, the lessons that he learns and the suggestions he has to give

it became addictive to scroll through delicious looking grids in search for yet untasted meat