It is the rule of thumb that we always want to present our best when going on a date. Clean clothes, clean shoes, trimmed nails, trimmed nose hair, refreshed breath, armpits and genitals are the advisable basics to keep in mind! Some guys unfortunately go a little too easy on one or more of the above-mentioned items, while others obsess with the idea of being perfect. We are all different, yes, but how far should one go on the spectrum of caring less vs. caring more than necessary about what the other person will think of us?

Several months ago, the frustration, and the after-smell, of a failed date with someone of non-existent hygiene standards haunted me to the point of writing about the cleanliness basics. Incidentally, twice within the same period, I have been dumbfounded by the what-the-fuck-was-that feeling after an abruptly finished date, but with the direct opposite kind! 

Curiously enough, both were bottoms in their twenties. In both instances, the prelude was nice and long: a pleasant conversation with a drink, which smoothly led to my place for a fun continuation. They enjoyed my tongue in their mouth, on their nipples, between their ass cheeks. They willingly spread their legs for the cock that had hoped to spend a good while inside them. After some time pounding them in the missionary position, when it was the time to flip them into the doggy style, we both noticed that the tip of the condom was slightly dirty, which seemed to have made them more uncomfortable than me. 


Nicely, I offered them to refresh themselves in my bathroom so that we could continue enjoying each other. But in response, ashamed of themselves, quickly and dramatically, they put their clothes back on and jetted out of my place faster than a bullet. . . to never hear from again!

Now I am not sure where the expression “shit happens” comes from, but I must strongly remind all the fellow homosexuals that anal sex is no sterile experience! While it’s good to douche before the date, everyone’s body is different so it’s impossible to tell how clean you’ll exactly be. If someone offers you to refresh yourself, this means they like you and it wasn’t THAT bad after all! Instead of running away from the “shitty situation” like an immature and insecure coward, for the benefit of both, you must give yourself some slack, especially since you went so far to come and enjoy that cock!


April 1, 2016


It’s been said that there are no two people with the same handwriting, same fingerprints or same personality. And if that is true, then the chances that you will find someone who will one hundred percent match all of your sexual desires are nil! Read: he will always be into something you’re not into, and vice versa!  Not talking radical stuff like extreme pain, ...


It is remarkable how, since I moved to Amsterdam three years ago, I witnessed the closures of several gay places I had grown to like. Whether it’s poor business management or bad city policies, I will not sit and cry about it! Instead, I will take this opportunity to go and explore beyond our former gay Mecca. And I am glad that I do, because how else...


It insults my intelligence to know that yearly 1,000 people contract HIV in a country first to let gays marry, sex workers work legally and drugs be sold in stores. It was equally as baffling to have been told by GGD, the Dutch health department, that the PrEP trial reserve list was so long that it made no sense to get on it. An HIV-negative male, I am frustrated that a mid-19th century rubber invention ...


In a recent study among the British youth between the ages of nineteen and twenty-five, 49% of the participants declared their sexuality as "other than heterosexual." Hearing how many people realize their homosexual tendencies well beyond the age of 25, I cannot help but assume that the other 51% effectively shrinks as people grow older.


Based on Gay Sex in the City column from Gay&Night magazine, published in Netherlands and  Belgium and the blog entries, the e-book is available for download on Amazon, AppleBooks, Kobo and Barnes and Noble


Misha M is a columnist and an author. In the blog he shares his sexual adventures, the lessons that he learns and the suggestions he has to give

I must strongly remind to all the fellow homosexuals that anal sex is no sterile experience!