Since I was deflowered, as a top, at the not so tender age of twenty-one, I have learned to work my straight shaped, normal thickness 18 centimeters to make my bottoms happy. Looking back at my experiences with different men, both active and passive, both good and bad, I have learned my angles, I have learned the speed and the intensity, I have learned the auxiliary moves with my hands, mouth, teeth, etc. In short, I have learned how to make a bottom moan!

Being exposed to different kinds of sexually charged material, it’s almost impossible not to notice the omnipresent worship of sizeable cocks: enormous dildos in sex shops, big-dicked actors in porn, ancient statuettes of male gods with penises as long as their legs, etc. The bigger, the better – we are led to assume! And yet when I look at the penis-length statistics, and see how 13-14 cm is actually the average, I must remind myself that in many cases a big dick doesn’t guarantee a good fuck.

One of my recent experiences in the now-defunct Thermos with a Spanish bald, bearded, rugby-built visitor has proven this to be true yet again! Cruising through the several floors of a huge gay sauna space, I got the attention of a friendly face motioning me to follow him into a private cabin. After a few minutes of slowly rubbing my face against his delicious hairy chest and stomach, I pulled his towel off to proceed further. 


His curved up dick did not look too imposing, 15 cm tops. After many painful experiences in the past, however, I did not trust him to take it upon himself to enter me, so I sat on top of it. Playing the active role very intelligently, the guy made sure I was sitting on him comfortably before he flipped me over to a missionary position and started thrusting, gradually increasing the intensity. But it was not until he assumed a certain angle with his member that I actually flew into the sky and spent a good amount of time there forgetting about everything in this sinful world! After hearing me moan, he kept on going, stimulating my prostate, making it, literally, fucking amazing till the very finish!

The fact that we are more sensitive and vulnerable on the inside of our bodies than on the outside makes the passive partner a blank canvas with enormous possibilities for the top to make art with his own signature. And it is up to the top to determine what makes his bottom happy. You may ask “how do I find out?” Easy as pie. Just try different angles, keep an ear out for his moan and when you’ve hit the spot, don’t stop doing what you’re doing!


August 1, 2015


As much as I love my idyllic Mokum, I have to admit to being a sucker for a spontaneous hopping on a train and ending up somewhere semi-exotic. One lazy weekend this past summer, it was Antwerp Centraal. After a scenic stroll through the medieval streets and a delicious lunch, I thought my Belgian mini-escape would not be complete without ...


Friday night. Club Church. (Z)onderbroek ("no pants") party. Mezzanine area. I’m leaning against the mirror wall of a busy upstairs, watching others go at it on benches, slings and couches. I make an eye contact with a handsome thirtysomething, who is slowly moving in my direction. A few gropes and smooches later, I complete a 180-degree turn ...


One of the world’s renowned fashion designers Tom Ford said a while back that every man should be penetrated at least once. In today’s culture, where the words like “manly” and “strong” carry a positive undertone while “feminine” and “weak” are a scornful taboo, Mr. Ford’s statement may raise a few eyebrows. The idea of someone biologically designed to penetrate allowing himself to be ... 


59 percent of men worldwide have ended a sexual relationship because their partner was a bad kisser, or so research says, meaning it outweighs all other intimate factors combined! A scary statistic, but one that makes perfect sense to me. Unfortunately, I’ve frequently experienced that people manage to turn this sweet and simple, but sexy act into something ...


Based on Gay Sex in the City column from Gay&Night magazine, published in Netherlands and  Belgium and the blog entries, the e-book is available for download on Amazon, AppleBooks, Kobo and Barnes and Noble


Misha M is a columnist and an author. In the blog he shares his sexual adventures, the lessons that he learns and the suggestions he has to give

it is up to the top to determine what makes his bottom happy