Friday night. Club Church. (Z)onderbroek ("no pants") party. Mezzanine area. I’m leaning against the mirror wall of a busy upstairs, watching others go at it on benches, slings and couches. I make an eye contact with a handsome thirtysomething, who is slowly moving in my direction. A few gropes and smooches later, I complete a 180-degree turn to face him with my backside. Without much further ado, the good-looking Irish fella (without “the Irish curse!”) starts rubbing his normal sized member between my very willing hairy buttocks. Everything is hot, horny and smooth so far, with the help of the right amount of poppers and lube. 
 

All of a sudden, there’s an excruciating pain. A pain so bad it feels like a war missile rather than a penis has been inserted into me. It not only kills my desire for the Irish candy, but for bottoming for the rest of the night entirely! Initially proud, now puzzled, the Irishman follows me, his victim, to the restroom, where I try to soothe my freshly raped asshole with multiple splashes of cold water while shouting at him: “You should always take it slowly!” 

Whether the Irish candy has learned his lesson or not, I will never know, but unfortunately, “tops” who quite literally have no fucking clue, are a painfully (pun intended) frequent occurrence.....

TIPS FOR TOPS

March 1, 2015

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Tops who quite literally have no fucking clue are a painfully frequent occurrence!

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